They made me do it .. i cried .. i begged.. i was shattered against my will.. they made me do it
and here it is...
those were days wen i saw no future, dreaded the word marriage and the dream it brought along.. was as lonely as anyone cud ever b..empty.. lost..heartbroken.. aching.. i did it...!
Not bad eh :P
BUT Seriously...
A stitch in time saves nine
or
Fake it till u make it?
Stupid Girl!
yea u got my point! but this post aint about paris hilton or jessica simpson॥ its about our very own Tamizh (zh stressed intentionally) media and the women who are movin way up ahead showcasing their u-kno-wat to the world, since they don have any thing to showcase inside their heads! I have a BIG QUESTION (typed in caps to show BIG :P) what is considered SEXY? wats the meaning of this word? i believe that nothin can be sexy without brains or the attitude factor that can come only from intelligence.. u def cnt stay dumb n sexy! u need to b smart to b sexy..so i think! Sexy is a relative term,.. which def doenst refer to the viewing of the thick material that covers our flesh and organs.. it has a deeper meaning to it than it seems like .. m sure u ll agree..
I dont watch much Indian movies except ofcourse any Rani's movie in Hindi and any Rajni's movie in Tamil॥ I'm not very proficient in this subject hence, but then i kno enough to kno how women have been treated in here, how diff women r treated differently, how some lose respect and fade off along with the glow in their skin and some come out shining as the real stars motivating indian women using media as the rite weapon..
What's happening to the tamil movies these days? We definitely are way ahead of bollywood in makin movies with class and most of the class movies i kno in bollywood are made by brains from TN. Thinkin of it, even the real beauties of bollywood, by which i mean 'beauties' and not 'skin-shows' are from the south. We have no neccsity to compete with bollywood's cheap attempts to sell, as they say in bollywood only Sex and Shah rukh sells. I do like glamor, i drool over sexy heroines..where the character calls for nudity i agree even that aint wrong.. but wat is the need of bringing in this unneccesary soft (?) porn into movies to sell em? its kinda tough on women.. n children.. who are fed this content without a choice. I go to watch a movie of a superstar i ve been a fan of for 20 yrs and i get fed with sex content without a choice, screwin my mood and day.. n so funny they call it a family movie.. then wat do they have porn movies for these days? .... i wonder how mom's with kids near them felt while watchin this porno shit...
This m talkin bout the recent rajnikanth movie kuselan ofcourse, i cnt imagine m writing a negative review on a hero i used to like as a child n still .. but has he lost confidence on himself? in the last 2 movies hes been using young girls to show skin to sell his movie.. sorry to say but shame on u for being a superstar, talkin bout women liberation, culture, and what not..well ok i already wrote bout shivaji, n how the fair sex was used completely unwanted in it.. but that stopped with glamor.. n since everything was acceptable then it has a gone a step further... well it will go a step further until there r women who can sell themsleves for money n fame r alive..
My words from Shivaji review ...
Anyways shreya or shriya whatever her name is looks beautiful, but cud ve shown her face a lil more and din expect a Rajni movie heroine to wear nothing but inner garments in all the songs twas like watchin a kamal movie or porn I shud say ॥ She cudve atleast worn a blouse for gods sake.. She looks beautiful,.. cudve made use of that .. Hello! Some respect plz!
I am sorry but i cant tell the same adjectives about this female, whose name am thinkin twice b4 i cud enter in my blog, i don want google to list me among some porn sites and cheap filmie sites with vulgar images of this (so-called) female Nayatara. I wud say this 'DUMB BLONDE' of India is a shame on womenhood, moreso on Indian women known for their 'beauty and brains'. What is the need for such a catergory to grow in a intelligent good-looking and talented environment like ours? don let it spread plz... trust me its contagious..
I can c Pink's vision in here!
What happened to the dreams of a girl president
She's dancing in the video next to 50 cent
... well i always thought that country was dumb n the women who are known to be dumb must b even dumber to lose their dignity for fame and set bad examples for the kids who grow up fed on media and nothin else.. its no denying the fact that today media does 90 percent of the parenting.. n it has a responsibility (atleast superstars need to kno how the mass blindly follows)..if she is the 'numero uno' lady of tamil cinema as said by many newspapers and websites.. i wonder wat role women are starting to gain in media..an item girl becomes the lead..or shud i say the lead herself just an item number.. thats all the place women have here.. i've seen heroines come n go as glamour dolls in movies, its ok to flaunt wat u got! but this is the first time m seein an actor being so shameless that she has nothin to talk in the movie, she is not a PERSON in it, she is a dancing glamour doll (who btw has no expressions except attitude on her scarsely visible bland face), well a tree with some curves (and no leaves) cudve done it! Real sucess is attracting men n women n children alike .. like many beautiful sexy looking 'talented' actors have done before..but nowhere have i seen a gal meddle around with her assets on the camera for whole minutes.. after sometime it gets boring even to the drooling men since.. there is no surprise nemore.. nothing stimulating ....nothin new .. nothin mysterious
I don't blame men at all! Until u've no respect for urself... dont expect anything in return.. sadly this affects the image of woman (atleast of that region) and their values cos media is wat shows all the world who we are.. but these ppl who represent us, let us down.. showing us the rong way.. don u c ur power and responsibility dumb gal? if u think ur showin lifestyle .. well try again .. ur showin desperation ... there is something called respect.. u can earn money and fame (def in many other ways, unless u ve nothin to prove like u obv do).. u cant earn respect again.. ur a human being.. not a thing made of flesh n skin.. wake up! Oh can we plz categorize these kinda creatures as something like hmm lets say ..non-women or mayb non-human (incase if guys feel ashamed to call such ppl part of their clan too)?
Mirror on the wall, damn I sure look fine
I can't blame those horny boys, I would make me mine
When I pass you in a club, "Ooh, lala!" you gasp
Back up boy, I ain't your toy, or your piece of ass
Cuz this body is a priceless piece of lovin' unconditionally
So, Mr। Big-stuff, who you think you are?
You was thinkin' you'r gonna get it for free
Hey ladies, let 'em know it ain't easy
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Now that's flaunting, that's attitude... that's sexy!
Disclaimer: This is totally Pink's and my opinion ... n does not necessary have to b right or rong!
PS: GUYS strictly no droolin over cheap shit in my comments ॥ don't we have a class?
There's a poll on what you want me to write on .. Do Vote!
Tagged by Pointblank .. so here is one more list of unwanted info bout me .. bak to bak!
I am: Swarna?.. i kno my sense of humor sucks.. on a serious note.. i am everything that you want me to be to u with a strong urge in me to be myself at the same time..i kno that makes a lota sense.. y is that i start writing paragraphs for one word questions!
I think: Without a fraction of a second of rest, but absolutely nothing productive. (I also think i can write :D)
I know: that one day we'll be dead and gone.. n we r fiting with life for nothing today.
I want: peace of mind..other than which my heart has been trained very well to not want anything in life .. peace of mind is an exception since its illusionary & elusive.
I have: MY MOM
I wish: everybody's pain is mine and let it end with me...
I hate: used to hate liars.. now kinda used to it.. i still cant stand disrespect, hypocricy and narrowmindness
I miss: gosh! that's everything i do these days, miss my college days most, the year 2004!, the rosy days of romance, the days wen i ran my own home, most of all wen i had a life :)
I fear: the unknown.. if i kno u, u can get away with murder, if ur not open to me, insecurity n fear clouds my head
I feel: lonely unloved empty unwanted .. and some balloons in ma head ... and hands...
I hear: right now the freakin voices in my head that talk for and against him!
I smell: hostility- vacuum - death
I crave: a single loving touch
I search: for the lost child in me who had dreams and desires.. for a reason to live
I wonder: how long do i need to keep existing?
I regret: everytime i hurt my loved ones .. everytime i lose my respect n give up my ideals .. everytime i fall in love and act like a loser .. everytime .. everytime.. actually everytime ..
I love: KIDS
I ache: wen my love aint recognised or appreciated
I am not: mediocre... average... normal
I dance: at the happiest moments of my life .. cant rem doing it in last few yrs :( soemthing i ll miss for life ...
I sing: with very very few ppl i have been happy n comfy with u .. otherwise only with my bike :)
I cry: for stupid reasons like a mosquito bite wen m down but not even for life threatening incidents wen m strong ....
I don't always: listen to myself
I write: yea i write ... so wat now?
I win: m not in the race
I lose: everything
I never: trust wholeheartedly... it takes a LOT to make me trust.. but if i do .. then i DO
I always: keep searching for IT ...
I confuse: i write
I listen: to empty spaces and the echo of the emptiness .. to beautifully expressed dark poetry in songs.. lyrics that speak my life.. my mind..
I can usually be found: on the internet, if not then on the internet..if not.. mayb m nomore :O
I need: to feel needed/wanted... a reason to survive.. someone by my side.. quite literally.. someone to pamper me.. Mayb m doin the tag in a rong mood, do i sound pathetic and desperate? Uff i changed this answer 10 times in the last 5 mins.. proves i dono wat i need
I am happy about: my life being eventful n chaotic and not bland n borin ..
I imagine: u wasting ur time sitting n reading this crap ... go get a life now...
I would like to tag:
anyone who is reading this and is super bored like me .. n believes there r ppl who r even more jobless to sit n read nonsense bout them..
PS: Plz VOTE in the poll.. i ve added many widgets for engaging you while surfing my site.. wud like to know what you think of it..
anoobhooti tagged me!
The Rules are as follows..
1. Link the person who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. Tell 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger's blogs, letting them know that they have been tagged.
wow wow! Dont i just love talking bout myself and the quirky me! ..that sums up me as such being quirky.. hmm can i stop here? :D cos i really cant think of nething worth putting down here.. well now that i added my new feedjit widget and i got to know that my readers are not jus the few friends i know who leave comments, i c ppl from Trichirapalli to Jamaica :) so i better maintain my decorum and not get too personal (read shitty).. naa who gives a damn!
if u really ready for more read on..but promise me u ll save it in ur short term memory n forget it wen u leave this page
1. ahh i got a block! trust me i thought for 2 whole days about what quirky traits i got n now when m asked to write i cant, mayb thats one point to be noted, i cnt work under pressure, i will not do something wen m forced or m required to do, i cant even sleep if m forced to, i can only work/play/sleep/shit at will!
2. i try not to hurt neone. i cant confront, i smile wen m hurt badly, wen someone's unfair to me, cant say no to nething, end up being a loser. but i cant ride without cursing, and make sure i hurt ppl who really mean a lot to me for reasons that noone can comprehend including me..
3. i cannot stand self-image damage, 2 things that can make or break my relationship with u is ur opinion on my words and my looks :) i kno thats more stupid than quirky :D
4. i love bad things happening to me, note 'things that affect only me'! like say, i long to get fever, everytime i get some pain i jus hope its some life threatening disease n get toally disappointed if its not :( i love to be depressed, n it gives me so much happiness :P
5. highy impulsive in everything, tooo fast in doin my work, MULTITASKING is a must, lets say there are 12 windows open rite now.. n now actually feelin bored :( i get restless if m idle for a min .. n however busy i am .. everybody knows the only word i wud say is gosh m bored! even in food, i cant eat just one item, or the same thing twice! Well Variety is the spice of life, u kno :P
6. Oh this is kinda my weakness i cnt go in elevators cnt use public toilets cant stay alone in a closed dark room.. guess wat i ve climbed 14 floors for the fear of elevator and i don need to tell ya what i do wen m traveling :P
yay! i reached 6! Actually now i can think of a lot more .. but naa m not gonna let u kno!
Am tagging to know the quirky side of
good bad and the ugly
niya's world
BeTwEeN tHe LiNeS
Semi-Charmed Life!
Cockroach in Cocktail
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Good luck! Make ur confessions!
It’s 2 years since I started this blog with today. No, I aint even gonna use an exclamation mark to that sentence cos life has taught me quite strongly this time to not get excited bout special days.. still somewhere at the corner of my stupid heart, there is a question called ‘WHY NOT?’!
But yea, no balloons, no cakes, no celebration, so wat now, there will b another yr and another anniversary, hey but there is a need for appreciation rite? After all wen even ppl cant be together for long, anything that lasts any longer deserves respect, so does this humble blog of mine, started as undefinedoxymoron.blogspot.com taken over by sansmerci.in. It’s always been there with me taking all the shit I dumped on it through my bad times and thro my happy times, taking into its identity everything that is me, and stand by it for that sake alone, I mean wat better friend/partner can u get?
Last ‘blogiversary’ as I named it had thanks to so many ppl of which some have loyally stuck with me tho the transformation of the blog has taken place obviously from a personal diary to other not-so-interesting posts. Maybe I just grew up in the process or got insecure that too much trashing mite make me lose this last friend of mine too. But sure thanks to vj, blind and B (who doesnt have a choice tho) .. n ofcourse everyone else on my blogroll and viceversa..who come on n off ..and helped me reach this number of hits!
So why this title? U always ask cos it never makes sense just like my head. The thought on my head being ‘with gr8 power comes gr8 responsibility’, came this title! Let's say, this blog being my power to create n tell the world (if I can go one step further n say) and change the world if I really make an effort to .. comes my responsibility to stay moral on it esp. not to preach anything I don practice or believe in. so I have used this medium to my best, to express my thoughts but with utmost care to keep an open mind n always end it with a but, if and ‘so i think'.
So is every creator, they have a power and the responsibility, I rem quoting spiderman in my university exam in a journalism paper and me quoting it being quoted in a PR class the next sem as a matter to be appreciated. (god knows how much I feared critisism wen I wrote it!) oh n talking of god.. and creators.. I see them synonymous.. ie creators being god (ofcourse I wud never say vice versa :P). A mother being given the power to create … has the highest responsibility in the world making the human offspring ‘a person’ and wen I say a person, I mean ‘a person!’ that’s a ‘God’s’ responsibility she has. Maybe, the only thing ‘ur’ god did good to mankind is, its impossible for a living being to not have a mother, n tiny-bit reason that cud probably wanna make me give a thought if there’s really such a well-wishing person to human kind making sure we get it all, a mother - if u want it or not, will b YOURS!
But most of us creators (in one way or other), experience the reverse of this, where life sucks with a lot of responsibility and no shit called power! For instance, our creative team has the responsibility to create advertisements that play with the minds of the customers and work on them. But what happens at most times is the team aims at satisfying the client servicing, who in turn works for the client's satisfaction who in turn works for his managers' satisfaction, who in turn looks for the CEO/MD's satisfaction. Responsibility of the creative to satisfy the ultimate customer takes the back seat since the team doesn’t have the direct decision-making power , even if they know the customer inside-out. So gr8 responsibility definitely calls for gr8 power, if its there, anything is possible, u jus need to take ur stand and stand by it! You can change the world, if ur responsibility gets the power! Maybe i think like a media person, that was my example, but m sure u have urs.
So yea ….oh shut up! So much for 2 years of blogging! u had to listen to all this random unrelated insequential thoughts of mine … but hey I rest my power n responsibility with this blog.. cos its me who delegates both to myself in here! Woo Hoo!!!! I run a place of my own n I did so for 2 whole f****** yearsssssssssssss… oh no I forgot! No overexcitement … maintain low profile…. Ahem :)!
PS: If ur wonderin y my first post is on AUG 6th '06 n m celebrating on Aug 5th every year, its the time difference. The first post actually came online at 6pm on Aug 5th '06 from Memphis, TN (from my work place). This post comes at 4 45pm on Aug 5th '08 from Chennai, TN (ofcourse from my workplace)!!
Hoping my blog and 'I' see next anniversary from who-knows-where, Yappy reading!!!
IF my biggest nightmare is to live a long life .. then urs shud b me blogging until my last breath! and looking at this 'inspiration' i mite end up doin it .. so beware!
This u wudve heard already .. bout the world's oldest blogger olive who passed away recently ..
Thats her first post, http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2007/02/16/olives-first-blog/
the person who has been typing for her (Mike) wants us to understd her 'blob' (thats how she calls it), first by reading that!
and this http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2008/04/24/someone-peed-on-the-fish/
is probably the last proper post from her.
wat enthusiasm! wat optimism! and wat is it tht makes life int for someone at 108! (yrs? :O) wen i cnt find one reason to wake up tomorrow ... no m not inspired, m more depressed thinking m a loser ... ah wat a loser!
Some parts of the blog are very cute and kiddish, probably its the second childhood thats speaking, as shakespeare (if m rite!) says.. so there is this other person Eric who had been blogging for her on behalf of Mike in the recent past since Mike was away and so the blog shifted to another place.
This is a nice post bout her school days 100 years ago! in the new (temporary) blog http://worldsoldestblogger.blogspot.com/2008_05_01_archive.html
very interesting .. really worth a read
and thats her final post after which everything has been from the others after her passing away.
http://worldsoldestblogger.blogspot.com/2008/06/settling-in.html its bout her days in the nursing home before she left the world.
they made a movie .. of course! http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/olives-movies/
Guess wat she has actually overtook this 96 year old, oldest blogger of Spain and here is a post of how they both communicated!!! http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2008/04/02/marie-amelia-replies-to-olive/
aaaah ..............A 96 year old inspired by a 108 yr old .. n a 25 yr old reading it with :O shakin her head with a big no no no ... m not fallin for all this .. but hats off!
some interesting posts i read
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2008/04/06/i-wish-you-could-walk/
wataaa memory!
http://worldsoldestblogger.blogspot.com/2008/06/sing-happy-songs.html
she actually was soooooo happy rather kept herself so happy in her last days!
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2007/10/17/her-108th-birthday/
thats her 108th bday ... uh uh wat??? wonder how it feels to c that ... thats like just 83 yrs from now :) i can wait ... I hope time flies .. no i really hope it does IF i were to live so long..
and thats one year anniversary post :D
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/2008/02/06/in-for-service/
Guess u can browse thro both the sites and get ur own fav posts .. but on a serious note, if somene has to live this long to see life from - days of walking to learning in a sewing school - to blogging right from her bed - .. shud call that a real life time experience.. wish i cud experience that but only if i can stay as happy cheerful active child-like and as beautiful as she is at 108!
Wish i discovered this blog just a few weeks early, I would ve had the honor or commenting n communicating with the world's oldest blogger.. well even now the blog is on and Mike is tryin to keep it alive with a 'In memory of Olive' etched on top while they r still discussing the future of the blog n wonderin wat to do yet.. u can take part in it too http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/
Maybe i ll wait for a much older blogger to come my way... but somehow Olive feels special and unique to me tho i ve no idea ... why?!!!!
Positive vibes can travel thro the net .. even after one's life, its still alive!
That's quite a discovery eh? :P
Fill it up fill it up.. The previous post has stayed on limelight for too long .. So what I've been doin all this while when that dumb post was catching all the unnessary attention .. I was reading other better, funny and interesting blogs unlike all of u who waste ur time on mine .. I have set this alert for chennai blogs and its too funny to ready the non-chennaites (esp northies :P) view of the city ..how much it varies from person to person .. the perconceived ridiculous notions, their surprise at the least surprising things and whole lota fun kinda pulling our own weaknesses, yes we kno! Let me take u for a small ride on the laufter rollercoastr I ve been goin thro .. strictly for chennai fanatics .. which I guess 90 percent of my readers who apparently do not live in chennai are!
Lemme start with our 'world' famous cuvaaam as a mark of auspicion :) guess this is a post from outa the country ..
http://christinewandering.wordpress.com/ says
Our walk home takes us along the Cuoom River, one of two rivers in Chennai. However, to call it a "river" is a bit of a stretch; the words I would use are more like OPEN SEWAGE PIT. The banks are littered (maybe teeming is a better word?) with garbage, and, at any given time, there are no less than four male motorists emptying their bladders into the water.
What does http://lifein360.wordpress.com/ have to say?
Bouquets on the city's infrastructure, it being an IT hub and its shining star - Marina beach and ECR…Brickbats on the weather, water and most importantly..the people…The latter mentioned drawback outweighs all the plusses since a city is made by its people and defined by its people..
And then adds
Wherevr I lived till now, people spoke both Hindi and English. English is good, but English all the time sounds too formal and artificial to me. Hindi brings about this element of casualness and informality to the conversation. Its more of the language you speak in with your pals. And in Chennai, its more Tamil less English :(:(….Learning Tamil is going to be a task now!…Basically at this stage, i cannot rule out the negative possibility of how life in this city is going to turn out
Yea rite!
Here comes someone adding oil to our fire .. !
Then, in Chennai, the government has a monopoly over liquor distribution, which means that restaurants aren't allowed to sell liquor. This makes it okay for a fine dining restaurant to run without serving liquor, and hence the price setters in the market are not high-cost. This probably explains why fine dining is much more reasonable in Chennai compared to Bangalore. Says http://skthewimp.livejournal.com/
Chek out an angry chennaite here.. http://sandhyaiyer.wordpress.com/
First, he said the people here don't even wanna learn hindi (He expects everyone in the country to learn hindi because it is our rashtra bhaasha), where as those in B'lore or Hyd speak hindi… I am a great lover of tamil and I somehow couldn't stand it when he told tamil is just another regional language.
Hey Hey chek this out and have a nice lauf.. at ignorance!!
Accenture Method:Hire a lion....Send him to chennai, ask him to stay on bench for a long time, ask him to eat idli,Dosa and Vada No hindi, kannada or no other languages speaking ppl other than TAMIL...No good food, No water..and specially No Beautiful girls And say him "Go Ahead be a Tiger". Lion dies in confusion he is Tiger or lion......
Oh that lion was http://blogdhaba.blogspot.com/
btw lion 'say him' is purrrrrrphect engleesh i say :P
But in Chennai, the life and the pace is pretty similar to the life I had in Singapore, hectic, fast, crowded and tiring.
Says http://vasanthan.blogspot.com/
Ahem ahem ahem!
Last but not the least here comes news ppl! Chennaites eat in banana leaf.. well yea we live in stone caves too :)
http://mylifeislikearainbow.blogspot.com/ compares
Chennai climate is BAD! ( Bad would be an understatement…I would prefer the Mumbai Rains to it anyday! )
The Auto Drivers/ Taxiwala's of Bombay are so much more cordial in comparison to Chennai.
The Chennai Junk Food ,am sorry to say is just average…….( now I am sure the chennaites would say that I did not know where to go and find stuff )…….but that is not my idea of junk food…you should find stuff when you are hungry (not having to go from one end of the city to the other to find a particular thing)
Chennai has too many people who booze! ( Imagine you find people drunk in the bus at 9 in the morning)
In Chennai ladies in the bus are always quarrelling!!!!!!!( Duh! Gets on to my nerves)
In Chennai you cannot hang out with friends at beaches and stuff at night. You have cops who would accuse you of indecent and improper behaviour.
Hmm…may be the simplicity of people out there is nice…..Hard to find that trait in Bombay!!!
For the Carnatic Music fanatics, Chennai is the place to be!
'Malli poo'( Mogra )….I simply love the fragrance….you find it everywhere!
The cost of living……. so economical and affordable!
Eating on Banana Leaves! ( very hygienic! )
The local trains are better out there ( But I would still prefer travelling on the foot board in the Mumbai Local trains)
Ufff!! I guess thats nuff fun for a day .. lemme get bak to my real world.. i almost forgot i live in this place a lot of others are hallucinating about .. but all i can say is hmm hmm......... no comments :P
I hear complains from few readers tht my posts don provide 'food for thought' nemore mayb cos its more about food food and food i write nowdays? .. but words and food are becoming equally passionate to me these days .. and wat better when i can combine both ... i do have some thoughts which i can share… or not? i dono …i sure have lost touch with writing controversies ..
But yes i am looking for some anwers to some questions m sure there r no answers to. then wat m i lookin for? Thts wat m lookin for .. ok cuttin the crap .. lets say m thinkin about the basic essence of life, or atleast wat i think and have always believed as wat the world goes around for.. if u know me u guessed it rite.. m bak to cribbing about love and as always wondering wtf is it! So typically me but hey do u have an answer?
So many things happening around me, weddings, heartbreaks, affairs, sex... emotions being played around left and rite swinging around everywhere in the air.. hostility care indifference detachment attachment lust ... well u kno emotions don u! Now what is love? The word that’s used for every damn thing with no value attached to it nemore ...
I feel love wen i get butterflies in my tummy.. na thts just freakin lust..na i wudnt give it so much of an honor.. its probably well... hmm just butterflies? I feel love wen my mom brushes my hair sayin m the most beautiful baby shes ever seen.. isn't it too unconditional to be love.. is that wat is just love? i feel love wen m made to feel special by someone.. me call that vulnerable.. u dumb gal! I feel love when my kids come running to me even wen I c them after a year.. its overwhelming to kno they rem u after so long.. hmm so this cud b love .. but thn again how far or long is it? I feel love wen m made love to .. but then there r so many times wen u feel like a fukin machine… well quite literally … no no no dear!
But wait I truly believe or believed that love is ever thing in the world to live for.. love is god.. it’s the only form of creation I know and so can believe it to be the creator or god or whatever u wnana call it..sometimes u do feel well … hell with it .. theres no shit called love its just a freakin word to fool me .. to make me do things I ll never do otherwise.. to make me surrender.. to make me budge.. hurt me gimme pain … but then again whats wrong in that? What else is the world spinning around for?
Yes I agree tht whatever may come I will not (even wen I so badly want to) give up my basic value in life – to give love and be loved .. in whatever way possible.. Love is giving… love’s inside you its more fun wen u give it out … than getin more n more n stockin it inside.. don wonder if m a saint! Apparently sometimes I decide tht I shud be expecting no love in return .. Duh! how long u think someone can keep giving? It only accumulates to frustration and desperation … and its ugly followings .. better unmentioned...
So now actually coming to the wat I wanted to say :D this key to life.. cud it mean a lot diff to a lot of ppl? .. it so confusing! Wen I say I love u I just mean I love u … wat else can it mean? But then wat does it mean? There r ppl who value it as commitment? Mayb thts wat the Indian media has projected it to be .. man thts scary.. if something as free-willed as love can be made a commitment … its like imprisoning god in some random jail on earth! It demeaning its narrow and its sick..but thts me alrite...most ppl don agre with me wen i say motherhood is in a gal rite from birth, i think its an inborn quality, feeling and value to be a woman in the first place.. i turn furious wen i hear this common sayin 'a woman is complete wen she attains motherhood' .. of crap man .. that is so ironically stupid .. a woman is a woman only wen she has the 'mother' in her .. and it has no shit to do with 'f'ing and makin another creature plz...
Getting back to our God being imprisoned, I ve never believed in commitment or anything thts forced upon me without love .. learning from life ..i realize m not exactly rite.. u cud always love ur commitment .. or love to be committed...thts wat a marriage is all about rite? else why wud any one wana stick to one person all their life?.. being an Indian thats a basic moral ethic in our country aint it?..
hey don chek the link again … yes its me talking… don get me wrong .. there is always an ‘if’ there is love… and there is always as many ‘buts’ as in this post…
BUT then again.... wtf is this love am crapping so much bout?????????
I came zooming back home trying to escape the scorching sun, wiping my sweat, turning the air conditioner on and actually talking to it… ‘F***in' cool up fastttttt’ I yelled frustrated. Nobody can deny the heat that had taken over Chennai this summer, like any other year but somehow this yr has burnt me into something unrecognizable. So one more bang at the door and that was my final call for the juicy watermelon my mom was cutting for me, well it better be worth all the pain I went through to buy it. What the hell is she doing! BANG BANG I knocked my door, no way on earth am getting outa the room. Still no reaction from her! Fine I walked out not able to resist the site of juicy red watermelon and getting it in my mouth cooling my head but wat I saw shocked me! There was this juicy fleshy YELLOW watermelon! Ahhh! Now what is this? No wonder she was wondering what to do with it so long. Is there something called a Yellow Watermelon or is it some kinda hybrid with pumpkin or is it just some Very OLD watermelon! I almost don’t care; I just want to quench my thirst right now… fine let’s ask Google and Wiki I decided; the only people I trust lately!
And here is what the internet told me… so many blogs with ‘SURPRISE’ I saw a yellow watermelon posts! But nothing from India … so mine has the privilege to be the first surprise-watermelon-post in a blog from India I guess! Anyways there were some useful info sites; Wiki has a very small entry in the keyword ‘watermelon’ itself that’s all. Seems this variety is 
supposed to be more honey tasting and juicier… so I rushed and digged in to the scary looking yellow watermelon hoping am alive tomo, cos I still wasn’t really sure how this came to India in the first place! But I don’t think this one’s any sweeter and better than our yummy looking/tasting life-saving weight-reducing reddy reddy watermelons!
Some info I got on the net!
http://www.produceoasis.com/Items_folder/Fruits/YellowWMelon.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watermelon
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080302112816AAhP71S
http://www.calorie-count.com/forums/post/44844.html
http://www.watermelon.org/watermelon_funfacts.asp
Some Man-am-so-surprised blogs…
http://caviarandcodfish.com/2007/06/01/yellow-watermelon/
http://funnyaccent.typepad.com/funnyaccent/2004/10/post.html
http://senacle.blogspot.com/2006/06/on-yellow-watermelons.html
http://www.forks.ca/yellow-watermelon--012708.php
http://jackson.typepad.com/photos/taiwanese_food/yellowwatermelon.html
http://www.chezpei.com/2006/08/yellow-watermelon.html
http://crumbs.nomadlife.org/2006/06/yellow-watermelon.aspx
http://thespicecafe.com/2007/07/24/watermelon-ginger-ale/
http://arrgh-matey.com/crap/yellow.html
The funniest thing I found after some research later is the Yellow Watermelon appreciate group! The tagline goes like … "I wish i was a yellow watermelon"! What the hell! .. hehehe
http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=4894980279
And of course some funny youtube videos too!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6kxP_hPeRi8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVyTDKisbQk&feature=related
