A date with Mr.Murphy

If anything can go wrong, it will!
If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
If everything is going right ... something is wrong.
Any thing that can go wrong, HAS Already Gone Wrong.

If you go to bed with an itchy ass, you wake up with smelly fingers!
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
Any time you put an item in a "safe place", it will never be seen again.

No matter where I go, there I am.
A person without values or standards can never be a hypocrite.
An expert is someone with an opinion and a word processor.
The road to success is always under construction
If at first you don't succeed destroy all evidence that you ever tried.

Mrs. Murphy's Law
If anything can go wrong it will go wrong when Mr. Murphy is out of town....
If something goes wrong, it's Mr. Murphy's fault.
If Murphy's law is right then it will go wrong
If you apply Murphy's Law, it will no longer be applicable.

And on the eighth day God said; "O.K. Murphy, you take over!"
If you make it through a Murphy Day...YOU WIN!