Knowing you is loving you and its been a decade since.

I didnt know what that phrase meant until I met you. I cant think of one person who cant like you knowing you (and i really do envy you for that!). And to know am the luckiest one who gets to be with u every min of every day of my life, there cant be a better life than this. This ode (ok random ramblings i mean) i write today might come as a surprise cos all i ever told you was your loving is never enough,well it is not that easy to keep a love-greedy drama queen for so long i say!

Its funny they say you have been my 'husband' since 5 yrs now, little do they know its the most insignificant part of our relationship. I have seen u thro the ten yrs I have known you... from a common friend, a net buddy. an obsessive crush, a roommate, a boyfriend and an ex boyfriend (not to mention an awesome side ka :P)! And the best one I have seen in any of those roles. Hmm okay lets say thats what i feel wen i look at the whole picture now... and thats all that matters...a crush that  has lasted a decade..I still can look at u and feel like a lil gal in love for the first time... i can simply hear ur voice and feel home wenever i am lost...I dono how u do it but only u know how to handle me... nobody else can deal with me sometimes, not even me! 

You have filled every missin space in my life at the most crucial times..... a friend, well a best friend, a girl friend, sister, brother, partner in crime...well even a mother (clashin with my amma's role most times!). Now I know what they mean when they say someone is your everything, there were million instances when I have felt I don have anyone, and always, somehow always, its only one person who wud fill it up, sort it out for me. I see its not that easy to play sister to your wife... definitely not! But my life and my normally empty dark and hallow heart filled up to the brim when you filled it up with the father figure i missed all my life... not just some father but the bestest ever dad I could possibly imagine in this entire freaking world if anything a step above that. I think that's wen we really fell in love...or is that what I kept thinkin at every other stage too? Thanks to the lil brat for bringing us closer... for showin us what love actually means...for showin us how much we actually need each other!

Who would believe that a chat window that opened 10 years ago is still open? Well from MSN and Yahoo to Hangout and Whataapp now... but i cant think of one day it stayed closed... and I still keep thinkin I have a million things to say to u :)


Knowing you is loving you. Nobody can deny that. And am so glad I got to know u as early in life and have a life time to love ahead of us....

PS: Just so you know, as against what ur assumng now, no change in our life, big or small, will change this thing I have always told u..... Life = You! You jump, I jump! Period.

If this aint love, then what is???

I havent been feeling very well lately. Seems like am growing another heart inside of me, the doc says. 

The making of my very own sweetheart, my very own piece of art.
Two hearts inside one body, literally. If this aint love, then what is?

I dreamt of a beautiful sugarcake yesterday. So pretty and charming, havent seen anything as lovable and cute in this lifetime. I felt in my heart what you call 'pure joy'... like an atheist who just felt the presence of God and had a revelation, like a person who was fearing death all their life just kept their first step in heaven.... yes there was smoke all over.. there was tears of rainlets... yes m too dramatic.. and loving it... it was like the softest flower.. it felt like a cotton ball.. it was like surreal..that it almost felt like a dream... it smelt like baking butter and it was lying next to me in my bed closer than my own eyes... all mine...that i almost wondered if i deserve it....as typically i would... (he/she has been replaced with 'it' for political reasons :P) 

And in a couple of days I will hear the beating of the little heart inside of me, just thinking of which the pace of mine is racing already. I hope i can hear it clearly, amidst the loud noise my heartbeats would be making. I hope i can record it in my mind forever and play it back whenever i feel low ever again.....

There was always something missing in my life ... y'all probably heard it million times.. my ever-so-sad stories.. i have always missed the romance how much ever abundance i get it in .. greed, ppl have for money.. i have for love.. the more i have the more i want... call it a hollywood romm-comm overdose i definitely have had more than a fair share of my u-don-make-me-feel-like-the-most-beautiful-woman-u-met-so-i-don-feel-special fights... n still won get enough.. but now.. i already feel it .. probably already confident that this stage in life that am entering into is going to be my best.. and most complete .. as there is nothin missin in it already... its filled with love and passion n finally i myself feel am getting more than enough.. i guess this sugarcake inside is my lucky charm.. n has already taught me a lesson about love. No its definitely not what i was missing all these days.. it is actually wat i was missing to note all these days... as much as i wud hate to accept it...

...this lil baking butter has the best dad in the world no doubt about it, so the mom now has tough competition to keep up to!!

Bring it on baby!

Will never be ALONE again!

Of sunshines and early mornings

Of late night movies and long musical drives

Of love unspoken but still understood

Of hearts that beat as one, well it’s more than just two

And is born inside of me already that which will never leave until I do

And made changes in me already that which no one until could

And now I know how it feels to be beautiful inside

And now I know how vital this thing -

this thing I never cared for - called life!

I will love you merci!

I don't make resolutions. I am not the type to discipline myself or anyone else for that matter. Yes I am proud of what I just said and you can stop reading here if you think that's lame. Well, for the others, where was i? yeah I don't think any sane grown up in the world would think a new yr will change their existing life, but yes we have been taught to start afresh once in a while so we have a 'chance' on anything that we actually deserve to. And what better day to start afresh than the first of January rite. Well if time is manmade, so is months and years but so are problems and solutions, resolutions.

Alrite, I should agree 31st dec night is one of those days in the year when i get all hyper and want to party and celebrate, frankly, i just need a reason. There is so much in me that I wanna change that I think if I dont decide to then i could never love myself ever again, not that I ever did, am still trying. So this year I have decided to stop thinking of the partying for a change and think of how to fix my broken self image in such a way that I would start loving myself and then I would probably have a chance at having a real life sometime in the future new years to come. I am not suggesting that I am going to take a resolution, I did almost closely once in 2008 if u rem the post I did few months before my wedding and 2009 was an amazing year i should say.

Frankly, I am planning another phoenix style start-from-scratch again this year, yet again, yet again, yes. I have decided to listen to my head and my heart, or at least one of them and give myself a chance at being someone I approve of. As easy as it might sound, it is the most difficult thing i can think of now. Self-control and self-love are two things I can never buy or sell. So this year instead of crying of split milk that nobody loves me, my resolution is to love myself and for that, act in a way that I would fall for myself and most of all, stop spending my entire life worrying if anyone else does. Wish me good luck :D

Its impossible to not social(media)ize a single line

After a complete 2 yr break, after writing nothing but website content,  social media messages, food reviews and marketing lies info, *yawn* you find a freestyle writer use punctuations and gramatically right English here, with no spellos or typos? Naaa... altho i absolutely have no idea where to start even wonder if i shud use the same blog or start a fresh new one..i realized my blog needed this break or even more to get outa the i-dono-who-i-am-anymore i-write-for-the-readers way of posting...a killer disease that takes years to cure esp only after the final and lasttt reader of your blog is chased away, you start writing your heart out again.


Its funny how things can break so easily. Destruction is a beautiful thing if you look at it carefully. No am not being my old pessimist self here... well perhaps i am.. but after a prolonged 3-months of chronic stress and reading on god-knows-what-all diseases on earth exist, you are half a doc and a fully blown pessimist. the last time i felt lke blogging strongly i decided not to cos  i din have ne readers left  i din want to write depressed nemore and i don feel like writing when otherwise. and this time i tght, wtf, if thts what i am thats what i am.. wait! i started to write on destructio

frankly i don have ne stuff to write other than such rambling.. the shamlessly bold i-think-outofthebox Merci is lost somewr inside my head... well i do think outside the box n sometimes even get out of it n stand outside the box too..but the urge to write it down n spread the fire... duh... its for those hopeless and dreamy young and energetic people who still dream that they can change the world... b4 they realize the world keeps changing at a pace they cnt even notice nemore...

So as life takes its course...as i shifted from teenagy wtf-was-i-thinking emo blogging to yes-now-am-married recipe blogging... probably my next step should be could be will be a cute lil how-my-baby-pee-d-today family blog like every damn Indian woman who sits at home tapping the laptop all day like me wants to survive in the social media does.. but me being useless and having a boring pathetic life unique and different as always...  my blogs henceforth wud b on things tht interest me.. like old age and medicine  like interesting medical information and my experiences... wisdom gained... and lost... well .... watch out... or nawwwtt...

Honest Scrap Award

Nish was generous enough to give me this award for my recipe blog what's cooking today?

The rules are you post the award and 10 things about you and tag back the blogger who gave you the award. About you can read here, jus scroll down to the tag part and i have almost 15 things bout me in there!






I wud like to pass on the award to wistfully yours, Mysore Pak Conversations, The Praveen, Nautankey and Oodles of Doodles.

Thank you Nish once again!

C'mon Baby Light My Fire!

Dont be shocked that m posting a blog...n m posting it with my left hand...don mind the typos n spellos (as always)!

When u reach depths, u don ve a choice but the way back up. That’s how I ve started writing again. I thought in fact decided for good that its over my flair to write or my passion for it, its reached saturation, its torn into bits… networking sites with status’ msgs, a let out of thoghts as soon as they start to accumulate, no more do we wrte letters ,. no more do I blog…email killed the letters, IM killed email..FB killed IM.. n yea lately I c buzz is killin FB too…too many thoughts..too many outlets.. its all getting a bit too much to put out a blog post.. no time to write my own diary to say in human terms…no more introspection..nothin can live without passion or depth.. my writing has lost it too.. as with my passion for life and living it…

When life gets mundane..no offence to marriage but as u get older and more settled.. there is no more ‘hunting’. I think as raw human wen we don hunt we don survive..wen theres nothing to seek nothing to look fwd to.. u die internally.. yea I got my desired partner and most desired job.. everything I ever wanted..and then the question arising is as simple as a complicated ‘ok now what???!!!’ no its not the deal and compromises tht come with the decisions I ve made tht scare me infact they make life worth fiting and living for.. after all m not someone who needs an eventless life.. always had an extra eventful life and love it wen I look bak at it.. I don like it smooth..infact i hate mediocrity in any form.. including an average life turns me off.. yes I do long for it ironically many times.. but its life and I ve learnt to take it as it comes..but when everything gets monotonous.. the passion is lost..the light is burning…but there aint no fire…m lost.. empty…unused…

To put it in my foodie terms, I wud equate it to eating the same breakfast everyday.. I wud rather b dead n gone instead.. I am not implying tht variety is the spice of life.. oh on second thghts yes I am but there is a possibility fr variety within means..well lets say u ve decided to eat egg for breakfast all ur life.. ur not gonna break ur promise but learn to eat it in a million ways and explore as well as discover a zillion ways to make it better everyday… now u know wat I mean…lota writers who don’t get a chance or din take a chance to b one professionally due to social and financial reasons envy me.. well.. wat ve I become in the end.. someone who is so absorbed by the monotony of a work that actually, in quite a literal sense, can have a lot more flavor and juice to it but I ve become a dry nut cracking slowly into an empty shell…

Love and hate are the same damn emotions, its jus how u perceive it in ur positive or negative mood..so u can only hate something as much as u love it…the strength of the emotions are usually equal...depends on ur attachment to the subject.. if I can love u this much.. I can hate as much easily...well so I decided I don give a damn if m seeing the glass as half full or half empty, m going bottoms up baby and that’s all I care!

Pushing myself to the edge.. I write … I don’t ve a choice and I will….wen every part of me feels injured physically and mentally.. I feel useless n wasted..like I belong in the trash…m makin my own recipe for a pill..yea the same old I knew..giving it another chance…no matter if I feel disabled nuff to even type… writing…m gonna be writing…left or rite or even with my legs… m gonna be writing…

I Write Sins, Not Tragedies

Poker-faced Parasite has come alive again!

Check it out

http://undefinedoxymoron.blogspot.com/2009/11/i-write-sins-not-tragedies.html

PS: Content Warning enabled

Vote for my Chennai Foodie blog

http://chennaifoodreviews.blogspot.com/2009/11/vote-for-me.html

PMS: Myths Busted - The Other Side of the Story

All u ladies in the house, here’s an open question to u

“How do u feel when ur really angry and pissed at something, its breaking ur heart, getting on ur nerves and u feel absolutely helpless and wanna break down, waiting on a regret or at least an explanation from him, if not a make-up act, and all u hear him say is ‘It’ll all be ok soon baby…ur just PMSing and m getting used to it’!”

This is what I have termed as the act of ‘Easy Blame Reversal Syndrome (EBRS)’!

Well yo’all know what am talking about… I can hear the guys sigh as tho it’s the biggest curse that has been brought upon them since the birth of human race…but I feel like its the biggest plot that men have come up with (they probably do have a secret sorority to come up with such stuff on a universal basis)…to fool woman into believing that she and her precious body (which otherwise is worshipped by the same men as the greatest gift to mankind) are the only reason for any pain caused to her and in fact its causing pain to him too.. tho not technically even close to what she goes thro.. his miseries are more talked about than hers..in fact the only recognized pain of hers is that which affects him, if u know what I mean! I wonder in olden days when ppl knew nothing bout how the body worked and how hormones caused mayhem…did they still go thro PMS? I don think so dude! Those times wen she went thro pain.. it was seen as mere pain..and was empathized with..not as a u-don-ve-a-choice-so-stop-whining-n-put-up-with-it pain…

Alright… pre/post menstrual stress do exist upto to some level very much..i agree.. but its completely manipulated by the circumstance.. if u notice it mostly occurs to woman who are surrounded by a lot of men.. rather at least one of them..or lets say the stress is projected into a huge issue only by the men around.. u say it’s a reason woman give all thro the month to justify their bad moods.. I say it’s a reason men give to convince us women that its not him, its ‘her’ who is to blame..and its bcos of her hormones and its problems that she’s this anxious, emotional and angry at this time..well it’s a way to give the woman the blame, let her take it without denials and also blame her later for using it as a tool to get what she wants..well in the first place, if she gets what she wants y the hell is she even stressed? Yes of course she takes a lil advantage of it and use it to her benefit sometimes, thankfully, every coin has two sides.

I hate to call it pre-menstrual stress and keep it gender biased.. if the pain is for both the gender (as the men claim)..I wanna abbreviate it into ‘Production Management System’ if not for reproduction mgt sys.. cos both the parties (along with the hormones) involved in reproduction are causing it and the person takin it of course is the same one who takes the pain of the final output too. Lets see, when he took u out to a beautiful dinner for ur bday last yr..and made u feel like a queen.. u din ve any pms even a day b4 ur chums.. but this yr wen he forgot ur bday or jus din care to buy u even a rose.. ur pms bugs him too much this month… so yea, if ur boyfriend’s cheating on u and u know it, ur pms hits u well in advance.. mayb 2 weeks ahead of wen it shud.. and who cares how much it is bugging u deep inside wen u very well its not just the pms! Well its all in ur body hon and its stupid mechanics.. ur poor bf has to take all this shit from u cos of it.. phew!

Those instances were explained to u from what I have heard from gals.. who have been and are goin thro this treachery… ignorant of the curse they are blamed for, naively acceptin blame believing its in their favor.. sometimes feelin guilty for it too…and what I ve heard from guys who are boyfriends/husbands of such ‘PMS Possessed’ females who are making their lives miserable. I have also seen perfectly happy couples (really?) not knowing what the hell the term even means.

Nevertheless, from my experiences with PMS patients (who are clinically treated for this) and from what the doc suggests and the placebos given to them (that are jus bcomplex and vitamin tabs under a weird name! thanks to google!) I say with all confidence and pride.. it’s a bloody myth.. and its well used and utilized by the society to fool us all into thinking we are being protected.. wen in fact we are being abused in the name of it.. (y not we start treating EBRS too?) Its jus Psychiatry baby! Don be weak.. don blame ‘that time of the month’ nemore for your miseries.. and then u ll see that its jus another physical cycle like u pee or shit.. yes it causes a lot more of pain than the said..wat else do u expect wen life fucks u yet again in the same damn hole...now stand up for ur rite gals…n if he disagrees…tell him he’s jus goin thro ‘EBRS’…fart the shit out back on to his face next time.. and tell me how he reacts, m really curious!

Disclaimer: These are not facts, but my personal opinions based on true stories (plus a little research on google) and a few extracts from my free (unisex) relationship ‘counseling’ sessions offered on gtalk that I will soon start charging for (per hour)!

(And of course forgive the hostile tone…m just feelin a bit aggressive cos m PMSing :D)

Promoting Narcissism

Its been long since I wrote a really random jus-typin-down-my-thoughts-as-they-flow post..in fact its been too long I actually wrote …I ve gotten outa touch with myself lately.. I ve numbed thoughts and not letting it flow.. I can sense I ve done it to myself consciously. but it takes a lot more for me to write as freely as I cud..bad I guess for a writer..cos no writing is good nuff if its not from the heart..i dono if its cos I ve become a readers writer…I still rem times wen I started the blog I din care who reads and jus wrote for my own let-out and used it as my punching bag…a diary I used this one as…but once the readership increased.. perception of the readers started influencing, sub-consiously tho I was in total denial..i guess now that I ve lost touch and lost readers too in the process… I can get to back to myself? (wait a min, am I shooing away even the few ppl who read me now..duh!) but anyways frankly now I cant write anything but for work..that explains y my food blogs are updated regularly..altho m too busy to write here…mayb cos m lovin it now too much and its like an addiction in itself…my work my hobby my everything it has become..sometimes overwhelming for myself.. still not got enuff of it..thanksfully!

and yea of course on facebook.. I think thts the culprit..everytime something strikes me now I have somewhere to express it rite away than pile it along n develop on it and write a proper post spillin my heart out.. (mayb I shud do a quotable quotes by sansmerci – part 2 post!) it usually goes unrecognized or misunderstood since its incomplete, even from my end.. I cant express wat I actually want to.. tho it feels nice to come up with status msgs reflectin my mood I shud agree.. in fact the whole industry is running on it now.. online media networking and even social marketing…wat else is twitter based on? Somehow m not into twitter (thank goodness!) but facebook yes takes all my free time nowadays..

What are we actually doing?! better communication and technology has actually tampered communication itself! I know all the blah about internet reducing socialization and stuff..but now even communicating has become short n quick n mostly half-hearted...i rem talkin for hours on the fone with friends in school days..now its mostly i catch up with them on chat all day so doesnt matter (probably my mom wud complain the same bout fones..there is nothing like meetin friends n talkin in person!)...'words' to me now means typed ones than spoken ones and smiles ve become smileys.. ironically tho it connects us to the oldest of friends from school and kindergarden too..which wud ve been a far-fetched dream even a decade ago…so we are supp to be more social now rite?

Hmm I dono its kinda confusing..i ve a million ppl online ..i feel on top of the world sometimes love being the centre of attraction … tell ppl wat am doin now.. show off my poetic writing ability..smart thinking..jus express how m feeling and get noticed for it…sometimes impossible to handle the number of ppl who buzz me during the day.. but in the end I only try to control my smiles at the monitor..lest ppl near me (who I dono at all!) shud think otherwise…and of course I eat my lunch alone! Maybe its jus me.. or mayb I need to get a life.. but somehow I c life goin on only in here…is it true? Or is there a real world still out there? I envy ppl who are completely internet illiterate and have no idea bout this big wild world out here..taking over our lives…

Ok so wat am I trying to say…I dono..i jus have this eerie feelings that this huge narcissistic promotions going on thro social networking .. is doin no good to the personality..its infact pretty depressing wen u get tired of it or jus don have access someday and feel left outa the world…like orkut was everything one day..it was where I used to wake n go to sleep to…now I don even login there nemore! Yahoo used to be my breath and today I don rem my yahoo password to login the messenger…And so will facebook or gtalk be soon…it certainly feels too lonely out here in this BIG internet world with access to a million ppl from anywhere in the world at ur fingertips..agree?

Eeram - The long awaited rains in Kollywood…

Impressed with the surprisingly refreshing recent Tamil movie 'Eeram', i ve been inspired to do something different too.. a movie review! There have been some of my 'comments' on movies in this blog such as these, Ofcourse Rani is still the queen, 3-in-1 movie review, Movie and a meal and of course my superhit post Push up my bra like that, Porno Paparazzi Girl (highest hits n comments on my blog until now..for all the rong reasons!)... i wudnt call any of them a professional review tho. (PS: all comments got deleted wen i shifted to this blog address :( )

Here is my buddin attempt at actually reviewing a movie...(other than the so-called reviews i've written in the film studies paper at college :D), read on.. and gimme ur review on it!

Eeram - The long awaited rains in Kollywood…

Quenching the thirst of the many who watch movies for more than mere time pass and entertainment, here is a winner, the no-nonsense super natural thriller, Eeram, a deep, involving and intelligent movie made by a team that seems to know what they are doing pretty well! What a relief from the commercial mind-less flicks, Eeram, as the name suggests, is definitely a patch of wetness amidst the dryness, it is a day of drizzles in super hot Chennai.

Eeram belongs to that genre of movies that release without much commotion and noise, but spreads through word of mouth and becomes a super-hit gradually. The professionalism and quality in the movie, and every aspect of it, speaks for itself and there is no need for huge budgets and sex appeal, when you rely on talent and confidence. No big stars, no song-and-dance sequences and of course no punch dialogues in the script. Produced by Shankar and directed by his assistant Arivazhagan, the cinematography by Manoj Paramahamsa is the best part of the movie, sets it a class apart!

The movie opens with the death of the female lead, Ramya (Sindhu Menon), the wife of Bala (Nanda) and the introduction of her past love interest Vasudevan (Aadhi) as the police officer investigating on her case. The film then flashes between scenes from their past and the crime investigation in the present. The love scenes from the flashback are a pleasant colorful relief to the almost black and white, always gloomy present. The ghost of Ramya, trying to prove her character to the people who shunned her when she was alive, uses ‘water’ to be her medium to kill her victims and the entire movie is literally themed on it, with little sunshine. Will Aadhi be able to help her out and save more deaths at the same time? Will he be able to find the mystery behind her death and find the person responsible for it, while his department loses trust in him? The mystery is not so hard to solve, you almost guess the accused right in the beginning, but the screenplay keeps you so engrossed, startles you at the precise moments and of course it is more than pleasing to the eye to watch Chennai all cloudy, rainy and picturesque all the time!

The director has taken a lot of care into the minutest of detail, in producing every tiny little necessary element into scenes, representing lifestyle, culture, character and logic, very subtly without jarring immature contrasts in anything. The script is very smart and adds to the mystery element of the movie well. The logic is never tampered through out the movie, a well thought-out plot. The editing and graphics add to the overall quality of the movie, so naturally done, unlike many cheesy graphics we get to watch nowadays. Aadhi does need a special mention for his outstanding performance.

Overall, professionalism is the key word for the movie ‘Eeram’, a must-watch for true cinema lovers.

U know ur a true Chennaite when u…

10. Can comfortably eat Idli at Sheraton and at a Thattu Kada outside it, with absolutely no fuss in both the places…

9. Know which 'auto-karan' to make friends with and which one to start a fite with and feel equally proud and happy about both the incidents.

8. Truly hate Hindi by blood.. tho the Tamil you speak is a dirty mix of words from English, Hindi/Urdu, Telugu and what not, only too twisted and tangled to recognize…

7. Cannot drive without swearing and cannot drive properly without such motivation from others either.

6. Rush to Bangalore every Friday night and try hard to book the Sunday nite (impossibly) unavailable train tickets back home...

5. Cannot make a funny statement without mocking Vivek or Vadivelu in modulation, no we do not say ‘Mind it!’ anymore… in fact, we never did!

4. Pay day at Pasha and Broke day at Bessie

3. Proud of A R Rahman as though he’s your cousin brother…

2. Can have filter coffee and Old Monk, one after the other….. in any order…

1. Claim to work in a sweatshop and stay 90 percent of ur time on Orkut, Facebook and of course Blogger!

The last one's a contribution from Brat....m sure i ve left out a lot... pls add to the list (dont gimme stereotypical media-projected nonsense tho)...dayaaaam... i am so jobless!!

If looks cud kill....then i must b writing this from hell...

Is it virtually possible to send out hate vibes to people? i have never hated anyone in my life ... i have had angers .. i have hated peoples specific characteristics.. i ve shouted and threatened to kill ppl too in moments of anger... i dislike some ppl at first site.. i dislike some ppl even b4 i meet them .. i ve been jealous.. i ve envied...i ve spited...i ve cursed...but i have never hated anyone in this last 26 years per se, i cant think of one person ...neither can i think of anyone who has hated me so much... again there are ppl who think m arrogant, m stupid, m selfish, m heartless, m an asshole... etc etc.. but jus plainly hate me for who i am? mayb someone does and i never knew it but it has never bothered me as much.. cos noone has ever meant that much to me in life to be affected by their vibes over me ... i am preacher of love and giving and wud foolishly give even if u keep on takin.. no m not proud of it .. i let ppl walk all over me cos of it .. it is my disease!

But NOW i feel hated... i feel hate vibes all around me.. don get me wrong.. its not bout family or friends they are all very supportive and infact takin all the shit i am givin them ...but there is hate and evil vibes all around me and i can feel it haunting me .. eating me alive...like a death machine...giving me brain shivers....am i paranoid...or am i really being hated so much? have u ever felt it? is it true? a vibe that can kill u .. looks that can give u a nervous breakdown...

Stand by Me - Part 2

After wondering for days (months?) on how and what to do as a come back post... i realised today is the day to do it... i started this blog with the same post 'Stand by Me' and it worked out well for me i guess... and this day Sept 10th! 5 yrs back was exactly when the stand by me campaign happened in my life... those glorious MCC days ... as i always say the best yr of my life was 2004 and probably this day was the one or one of the reasons the year was made special...

I post the video which summarises everything i have to say about what happened on this day.. the script was posted by me in my first post.. this one almost has the same script but picturised so beautifully... with the best ppl i have met in life.. both my friends and my kids.. the place where i grew up and understood myself... i am a proud product of wat i have learnt from this place.. don get me rong.. not the college.. but the group and the activities... and yea bout my kids.. i don need a mention .. my blog is full of em .. here n there.. they need no introduction ..

So this is to my kids...after 5 whole yrs .. and not being able to meet em for almost a yr now... missin u babies... and for my friends and a best friend....i missed somewr down the line.. missing u guys too...if only someone cud take me bak to those days... i mite not b wat n where i am today... for the better or worse .. that i dono... but nostalgia kills me ... so wat's new?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-maGSCVq7c

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYKqkqRwLrQ&NR=1

Watch both the links - its a continuation of the same video ...

PS: wow i cud write so much .. y didnt i blog so long!

I do remember you my first love!

Ahem...havent taken such a long break ever from the day this blog was started.. yes i have no excuses to make, i was absolutely jobless... rather i din have a job per se (i was still working trust me) and had all the time for my new za za zsu my recipe blog (wata b**** m still tryin to promote it) ... so no excuses i kno.. i have been a bad gal..i have lost almost all of u in this process.. but i pretty much needed this break from my personal blog..since a lota changes ve happened in my life and this place needed yet another new avatar.. if not a complete make over but atleast a pause and a start (ah! i found something to explain) ... watever said n done m jus hopin this time around it gets a new face an recognition like it did last yr after a small make over in its looks and tone and character too...

So i dono what to post on ... m sure u have guessed it by now.. but i have been postponin posting just due to this reason and i had to confront it by typing everything that comes to my head... thats how they say writer's clear their block usually... but if i write down everything on my head now .. trust me u don wnana read or come bak here once again . So i ve decided to take up this tag .. looooooooooong pending one tagged by i dono who all .. m guessing Renu, Nancy and Neetu and someone else too m tryin to remember...anyway this is to list out 25 random things bout me and m gonna do it rite away without yappin further....

1. Random things about me change from time to time. so wat i say now may or may not hold good in the past or future.. even in the recent past or the immediate future.. virtually this is a useless document we are preparing then ..

2. I think one word to describe bout me will be 'dependant', yea i can get dependant on anything from a person to a place to a substance to a food.. i am a parasite ... and a very loving one at that ..so there is always an addictive quotient in me .. both ways... easily addicted and very much addictive once you kno me ...

3. i can talk talk and talk for hours and you can kno my life history in a few hrs of conversation with me.. i cannot keep a secret even if it means to degrade my life into something very cheap i will still let the world know what it is.. uh i hate myself!

4. i am a set of extremes.. ritely called the undefined oxymoron formerly... i am an all or nothing person .. m either too happy, elated and jumping or down depressed and completely hate my life ...too busy or too lazy...too high or too low.. too amitious or completely laid back.. too level headed or too emotional... i can love u unconditionally or hate you with ultimate venom ... i can be an angel or a demon basically... but never in between

5. Okay enough of negative things bout me .. lemme c if something good there bout me.. i like helpin people.. does that count as positive? sometimes no... i jus cant say no and i go outa the way to be there for people .. and after being walked all over by others selisfhness i sit n cry in self pity .. but then again .. i like it that way u c!

6. damn i cnt even writ 5 things bout me .. i used to write pages... ok lemme make this snippets... hmm i love writing .. i can write thro out the day and still dream bout it like its a distant vision to achieve someday ... i write for my work.. i work for entertainment.. i write for time pass.. writing is my profession and my hobby and m still not gettin nuff of it!

7. i love kids.. anything esle in the world comes secondary to them...unquestionably

8. i am a sucker for love. period.

9. big time foodie.. doesnt need a mention

10. if u leave me alone.. i ll do crazy things to make sure i don need to stay tht way.. even if it means to destroy myself to get a release .. now thts something that surprising me too

11. i often feel lifes too long to live .. m sure not many feel that way...m too lazy to live thro all those yrs ahead of me

12. nostalgia kills me .. to an extent u won believe.. i can think of a place i lived for 2 days and die for it hatin where i am now ... and it continues ...

13. i ve learnt that life is a vicious cycle ,,, watever goes around comes around and keeps going and comin around .. even if u make serious atempts to put a full stop somewhere...

14. i crave for attention and appreciation.. wen i don get it i cnt survive... i begin to think m not worth living ... losin self esteem is the worst of me... i need to be motivated always (hint hint)

15. oh m already startin to feel i ve lost my readers and noone is gonna even read this shit y am i writing this now!... there u go.. told ya ...

Nah .. i just cant think of 10 more things bout me now ... and m sure u wud understd.. i ve said more than i need to in the 15 already! :) and m hopin to write something good.. in my next post!

Here Comes the Big Momma!

Hey all! guess wat it is this time? I am 3 months-married and already have my 4th kid here! Too much to manage eh? ur damn rite! i got one more blog this time a recipe blog! i always wanted to start one but was too lazy and never had nuff time to cook and display :) So here it is for ur viewing pleasure anytime swarskitchen.blogspot.com, Brat will b sharing his preparations occassionally too since we share the kitchen u kno :P




Now go n chek out my new blog and tell me how it is :D

I wish...

i wish the tv was a woman
and loved him back as much...
yes! i love him enough to wish for that
no! i don love him enough to wish i was her...

i jus want to feel jealous without feelin stupid!

Havent you checked it out yet?

i gave birth to Poker-faced Parasite recently!

Where do i write now?

Yay! i write news for metroplots.com, no m no real estate guru but yea i can write and hmm yea i can WRITE that pretty much makes me (rather i can make myself) a guru on any topic in the world! You can read it here http://metroplots.com/news/. But trust me, this is a really cool real estate site for chennai rentals and apartments for sale n stuff! Yea i am looking for new place to stay .... to make a home of my own :) they provide end to end solution to make a home for newbies like me http://metroplots.com/services/

Other than buying, selling and renting properties, this site is not a classified page per se, its fun to browse thro, the homepage tells u the per sq feet rate in every area in chennai, i loved that part.. so i can keep havin a watch on besant nagar and wait till the time i can buy that beach house!!!! Why am i promoting Mr. Metroplots here? cos i BLOG there and they reward me :)
and i thought i can let ya all kno so u can read my words of wisdom as well as write ur own and get rewarded too :) NO! i dont write for nothin, unless its on sansmerci.in :P

If you are completely clueless to write on such stuff, jus like me :D, u can also participate in the Facebook forum, join the group. http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=42882173612&ref=ts, they have happening discussions there about best places to live in chennai to interior designing to what not?

Now lets get to business! You can join and blog too... how hard is it to write about our home? i mean the topics are not just limited to real estate so any of us who survive in any kinda place has something to write about! http://metroplots.com/blogs/

My winning post was on Vasstu Shastra (yea rite!) and this i din wanna paste again here, but since i havent written here in a long time, pls do read my post and pass on ur comments there :) http://metroplots.com/blogs/?act=detailedBlogs&blogs_id=13

PS: i ve a lot of tags to complete, i ve not been regualr on blogospehre, i been a bad gal. I will read all ur blogs, every post and comment in everything i promise, since m completely jobless starting today for the next infinite number of days to follow....